EVI returns from planet vacation

Whew! Two and a half weeks of no technology, no cable, just ocean, bike riding, hiking and sleeping in a secluded cottage on a country road WITH NO TRAFFIC.

Truro was a very welcome respite for me this year. I had no idea that 2008 would be such a major drag. I had lots of time to decompress and make some MAJOR decisions in SILENCE.

Every time I went to the beach, I made a point of running into the water as soon as I got there. It felt like a baptism every time. Nothing like the mighty power of the Mama Atlantic to slap some sense into you. And it did.

I loved the sensation of submerging myself into cold salty water as the waves swells rolled past me-- a force that couldn't give a shit about the day to day worries that piled up in my life for last six months.

It's nice to be able to check on all my blog friends. Especially one down in Louisiana who is getting ready for the storm that's brewing.

So that's how babies are born...

Ben had his yearly physical this week. Last year when Ben turned nine, his doctor suggested that we begin to discuss puberty with him.

Keep in mind, my son still marches around the house naked with the total abandon of a five year old. He can frequently be found standing in front of the TV nude with a long forgotten bath towel at his feet, far too mesmerized by ESPN to realize his position in the time/space continuum.

A pre-teen wrap session?! Ben would have none of it. So we moved on.

Ben is now ten. He is a big tall boy for his age (in the 98 percentile - where he always is).
His wonderful fabulous doctor suggested that we begin to discuss the birds and bees with him.

I just don't see it happening, but I had my husband take a crack at it.

Ben said he didn't want to learn about the birds and the bees because he already knows about it.

Reproduction according to Ben:

"A mommy and daddy sleep in the same bed. A mom gives the daddy the eggs, then a mommy gets pregnant and a baby pops out of mommy somewhere down there."

What do you mean "gives the daddy the eggs?"

"I'm not sure about that part. But who cares."

Better luck next year.

A Word to the Wise....

Don't EVER do yoga when you are in a bad ass mood and hate the world. You just might fuck your knee up and pull a muscle in your lower back...why didn't I find solace in drugs or alcohol like the rest of the genetic pool I hail from?!

The Kids are Alright

My professional life is keeping me super duper busy these days - - away from the many blog updates I would love to share. So time for a bit of catch up.

Years back when Ben was a little less than two years old, I brought him to a dinner party at the home of some friends in Brooklyn. They all thought him utterly adorable - which he is - and said he looked like a little angel with long auburn curls.

I stared down at my sleeping son, splayed out on their couch with his belly hanging out of his tee shirt, and I responded with total honesty...."Really...a little angel? When I look into my son's eyes I feel certain that he will grow up to be Keith Moon....hopefully a less excessive version."

My friends were shocked and could not understand how I saw that in him.

Fast forward to 2008. My son Ben is ten. He is OBSESSED, OBSESSED,OBSESSED with The Who. My husband brought him to get his haircut at the Israeli barbershop around the corner. Ben opened a rock book pointed to Keith Moon and said "please cut my hair EXACTLY like that!"

A mother always knows.

Ben wants to be a Mod. He has asked for purple round sunglasses and feels certain that I have the ability to SEW him a British flag jacket (note Pete Townsend above). He had Brian take him to Ben Sherman's in Soho to buy a tee shirt with the Mod target design on it. How did he even know where to find such things?!

He spends countless hours on YouTube playing "air" drums to Who clips.

And of course I will oblige him.

The vendors on St. Mark's Place have the sun glasses and I will order him the Union Jack jacket...all in time for the first day of school where absolutely no one in his class will know what the hell he is talking about...which is just another day in the life of my beautiful, quirky boy.

Help Me Beet the Habit!

Every time I see beautiful beets at the green market I fall in love with them. Beets are my favorite color. They are tastey. So I buy them....and proceed to watch them rot in my fridge. It's becoming my little ritual.

How do you cook beets? I like to eat them cold maybe with dressing on it. Any ideas? Help save innocent beets from dying in my fridge!

Fourth of July

Remember that song from X? I always loved that song.

Yesterday was a quintessential NYC day for us. We got on our bikes and rode over to the East River Park. Tons of families were out there grilling and relaxing - just a huge mix of everyday people. There are these tents you can set up - basically a roof on four poles that everyone seemed to have. Seeing all these families and friends together made me wish that I was at a gathering like that myself. I'm sure my mother and her family did the same right along this park years ago.

We proceeded down the pathway that takes you passed the Manhattan Bridge, the Brooklyn Bridge and South Street Seaport. At that point, we navigated our bikes into Chinatown for a stop at Dim Sum GoGo. If you come to the City - you must go there. It isn't fancy but it also isn't intimidating (as in you must speak fluent Chinese to enter).

They have a standard menu which we forgo for the one page dumpling menu where you can check off what you might like. Each order of dumplings has about three or four dumplings that are delivered to you in a bamboo steam basket. We usually get two orders each of some kind of shrimp, chicken, veggies and fried pork dumplings. Basically, the waiter comes to our table with two towering columns of bamboo steam baskets....we are not a proud people.

After lunch, we got back on our bikes and rode down to Battery Park where we were joined by the rest of the population of NYC. It was packed - but again, I just loved seeing everyone. I love New York. I love the diversity of class, race and ethnicity. As I get older, my love of this city has become deeper and more personal. On these sorts of days, you feel the love returned.

So it's getting hot and we keep on riding. Ben is being a real sport. We ride along the Hudson River and reach the West Village, where we cross over and ride into the East Village. There we celebrate at Ben and Jerry's over well earned ice cream cones. Later that night, we barbequed hot dogs and watched the Macy's Fireworks on our roof.

Nice Day in the Big Apple.

The Blind Leading The Blind

Today I was coming home on the L train when I noticed a young woman beside me playing solitaire on her ipod or something that looked like an ipod.

I'm sorry but how the hell do people play card games, video games, watch movies and read the friggin newspaper on screens that are essentially two inches high and three inches wide?? Why put yourself through that hell? I'd rather daydream.

Why would I watch a movie or t.v. show on a screen as small as the palm of my hand - - or smaller? It just amazes me how much time people spend on their technology. It frequently seems like communication that is less about content and more about technology.

Just tons of noise and visuals being pumped into our eyes and ears non stop.

Remember Me?!!

Short staffed and work has been non stop for quite some time. Not fun. Not fun at all.

I miss all my beloved blog friends.

Went on a tour of Ben's new day camp. It looks pretty nice. He seemed to be warming up to it in his shy way.

Glad to be back.

Now THIS is New York

It's 6 pm.

I'm sitting by my front window and there are about 300 people across the street learning how to salsa together in Tompkins Square Park. The instructor is guiding them from one step to the next. To see all these people moving in time with the salsa and instructions echoing across the park is beautiful.

It looks like they are moving into the Rumba! Now I want to take lessons.

I'm on my own this weekend. The boys are up in Boston making a pilgrimage to Fenway Park so I'm flying solo.

As my first act of defiance, I woke up at 8:05 (about 11 am non childrearing time). I walked Saki all over the park and hung out with my friend Martin for a while. He is an artist and a surfer.
I did a few chores then took Saki out to check out the...

UKRANIAN FESTIVAL on East 7th Street afew blocks away. My dad is part Ukranian and spent many years as a child living on or near 7th street.

I dropped my thirsty dog home and went to St. Mark's Place to watch the Dance Parade that began somewhere in Chelsea and shimmied down to Tompkins Square Park. That parade did me a world of good. There must have been a zillion different dance troupes, dance schools, dance groups and a few dancing drunks shaking their groove things for blocks and blocks.

What I LOVED best about it was that the people dancing all had different bodies - sure there were the lean and tall legions but they were way outnumbered by the wiggily, jiggily let it all hang out baby brigade. There were disco dancers, followed by South American traditional dancers. There was a group of black women in black unitards and plumed masks on roller skates doing disco moves. At one point I saw a guy in traditional Greek costume hanging out with a woman who was one of the multitude of bellydancers who showed up. It was just insane, sloppy and great.

They all marched into the park where...they danced some more! At the water fountain of the three graces - three women each wrapped long wide red pieces of cloth around the sculpture and then wrapped themselves in it, moving position very slowly while someone played the violin. It was cool!

After parade watching, I got a slice of pizza and went to the gym....you read that right. Then I wen to Trader Joes and came home and plopped myself down. In two hours I'll be going over to the Pearl Theater on St. Mark's to see the Importance of Being Earnest.

It's a good day in New York.

My Baby

Today I walked down the stairs of the subway en route to pick up Benjamin after work. I'm going into week two of a crummy sinus infection and work continues to drain the joy out of me these days.

I walked by the magazine stand on the platform and glanced at all the gossip magazines that seem to rule our culture. Don't people get bored sucking in all that garbage? I take it too seriously.

I looked over and saw the front of the New York Times and it showed a pair of Chinese parents who made a make shift cover of cardboard around their eight year old son's face. He was dead. A victim of the earthquake. It looked like he also had a blanky they brought to comfort him on his journey home. They sat together tenderly attending to him. Doing right by him.

So many of these families have only one child in China. I can't imagine the grief hanging over these communities.

Needless to say, my job and health woes began to shrink down to their proper scale. Here I was running to pick up my beautiful son. And I was dam grateful.

Mommies Rule Daddies Drool!!

.....Or so my son Ben claimed this morning.

It is Mother's Day -- a day which is part of my holy trinity (Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, My Birthday). After 18 years of marriage, Brian stands at the ready with flowers, cards and a gift - - all the tools necessary to feed the beast that is Mommy!

Happy Mother's Day to all you wonderful mommies out there. You make the world go round.

Yep. That's what I did.

I was making the rounds and read writermama's most recent post (see link to writermama in the column to the right). Check it out.

It's an interview with some local downtown friends of hers who chatted a bit about life and style back in the late 70's/early 80's when the big apple was a lot grittier.

For me - nightlife began in 1980. Going to Danceteria, the New Peppermint Lounge, CBGB's. Having wide streaks of purple running through my thick dark hair. Army boots, Doc Martens, heavy black eyeliner, used tweed coats with big black guy belts. Impromptu huge parties in warehouses downtown. Wearing about fifty black rubber and silver bracelets on each wrist. The music, the nightlife and the fashion felt so sloppy, beautiful, interesting and alive.

The feeling that anything goes. What the hell feels better than that? I can't see that here anymore ... that feeling is the key to paradise. There isn't a day I didn't cherish it.

A good friend gave me sage advice. She said, "You didn't lose anything. You are your own East Village."

God knows I'm tryin'. Sometimes I just feel like the Cross Bronx Expressway.

Free Love in the Park

Don't be fooled. It is very easy to have a personal relationship with a park. This weekend I got to spend some precious time across the street in Tompkins Square Park. How spoiled I am to have this beautiful green square to look out on every day....well maybe the noise of Avenue A balances it all out.

The other day I was walking Saki through the park. The volume of blossomed tulips was extraordinary. Red and yellow beautiful tulips everywhere and so densely planted together. It almost looked like an error in landscaping. Either that or the bulbs were planted months earlier by someone on speed. The daffodils made a strong second showing. Regardless of the back story, I still enjoyed the flower explosion.

I'd also like to confess that I have become an owner that chats with their dog while walking around in public.

On Friday evening, Brian, Ben, Saki and I went out to the park to shoot some hoops at the corner of the park by 10th and B. The sky was a deep blue violet and the courts were lit by the dim gold lighting that goes on as the sun sets. I felt very happy to be exactly where I was, doing exactly what I was doing. It's been a long time since I've felt that way. It was one of those zen moments that comes out of nowhere. Moments of unintentional bliss.

Shakespeare's Birthday

.....is today. And for that reason I consider it a personal holiday. Even if I must go to work.

Work.

It is feeling very work like these days. Feeling more like "a job" than work. Very sad.

And yet I remain stubbornly hopeful that I will one day soon resume my usual custom of skipping to work.

Cool

If you look to the right of this post, you'll see a list of bloggers I read quite a bit. One of them is
Writermama. I really enjoy her blog about city life, librarian-in-training life, writing life and mama life.

Every Monday she posts a Monday style post. Most of the photos are girls and guys on the street - mostly downtown wearing something neat. These posts have made me more aware of what people wear as I take my long subway ride to work from downtown to way uptown.

The verdict is that every day New Yorkers dress cool and with great style. I would wager that they dress cooler than any other city in the world. And it isn't only one type of cool. The diversity of class , age and ethnicity make it even more fascinating to me.

A good reason...a great reason to love New York.

Recession? I think so!

I am a woman who enjoys cooking. It is probably the one thing that I do without looking twice at the cost.

Boy is that a thing of the past.

Every time I go to the grocery store (from the glamorous Citeralla to the crunchy Commodities to the supermarket of your choice) I have become more and more amazed at the prices. Orange juice costs $5, cottage cheese $4.50 - I went somewhere and saw lemons for $1 each? Are you fucking kidding me? I think it's time to grow my own lemon tree.....

Which brings me to my backlash strategy. I am so going to the greenmarket now for everything I can...even meat - which I never did. I'm also seeing more meat/poultry at the Union Square market. I'm trying to cut the shipping, packing, gas overhead out of my grocery bill and hand my cash over to local folks....I'd rather they had it any way. Driving it down from upstate NY has got to be less than shipping it from CA.

I saw a small container of guacamole at Whole Foods priced at $8.99.
Whole Foods can kiss my ass. Where did those avocados come from - Mars?!! Were they hand picked by Christian Bale and placed in a wicker basket that was Fedexed to NYC?
I think not.

Ben Ten

Yep. My baby has entered into the double digits just a few days ago.

We celebrated with his band of cousins and grandparents singing/shouting Happy Birthday to him.

The cake was HUGE. I ordered a 12 inch cake that looked a helluva lot more like a 16 inch cake that was six inches high. Basically it appeared to be a Dr. Seuss cake. Something you might see eaten in Who-ville. The outside was chocolate ganache with a devils food cake and chocolate mousse filling....I am not a fan of chocolate but even I enjoyed it. We ordered it at Ciao for Now on East 12th Street between Ave. A and B. They did a teeeeriffic job.

We gave Ben an electric guitar, an Epiphone - "like the one John Lennon had". I realize I may live to regret this purchase but I married a musician so I stand unafraid.

Cooperstown

It's Spring Break!! Two weeks of keeping my son entertained while not losing my job!

We finally decided to bite the bullet and head on up to Cooperstown, NY for three days. I'll be honest, the prospect of devoting my life to the Baseball Hall of Fame for 72 hours seemed less than promising.

And yet it was wonderful. Cooperstown, New York is a quaint small town sitting on the edge of Lake Otsego - about four hours north of New York City. I love going places off season - whether it be Cape Cod, Europe or Cooperstown. The air was crisp, the lake clear and beautiful and the surrounding hills (foothills of the Adirondacks I suppose) pristine.

Upstate New York is stunning. You can see how artists fell in love with the landscape and writers continue to be inspired here. The Native American spirit is everywhere.
Check out the Fenimore Art Musuem and the Farmers' Museum - - they really are cool.

Coming back to the City feels less and less exciting to me. Those Cooperstown people seemed pretty happy to be nestled in the splendor of nature and the life of a small town.

I guess I would miss the Arab guys who run the bodega two doors down from me. They make me feel like I live in a small town.

Hey Neighbor!!!!!

I was rounding the corner of A and 14th on my way home and for the first time in about five years I looked across the street - the east side of Avenue A.

My eyes locked onto a place that looked like a precious coffee spot. Remember when a coffee spot usually meant sixty year old waitresses, the Daily News, donuts as big as your head and cheap coffee? Not anymore baby...that went the way of the dinosaurs years ago. Even Dunkin Donuts is pimping itself out with Milky Way Hot Chocolate. What the hell is that about? Who would drink that besides a jonesing heroin addict?

Which brings me back to gramstand - the place I "discovered" today. You see that particular side of Avenue A was the home to one or two heroin hang outs masquerading as bars for so many years that I literally blocked out that part of the street from my line of vision....just a few short blocks away from me.

Now we have gramstand which is not a coffee spot but a tea spot with a website and a mission statement. The young man who sold me my coffee for $2.70 was very nice. What can I say. It's a new world order.

A Mover And A Shaker

Some big changes at work.

My boss is moving on to the women's college for super duper smart girls in the Boston area. This leaves her job opened and a few dozen people asking me if I'll be throwing my hat in the ring.

Sigh.

Throwing your hat in the ring isn't always everything it's cracked up to be. My happiness comes in people (like the president of the college) encouraging me to consider it because they respect my work. Receiving this affirmation from so many people is a huge gift to me.

As for my hat flying into the ring....well girls....as my generation has learned the hard way, we can't do it all --- especially not at the same time. I realized this tragic fact when I had problems recalling what my son was like from the ages of two through five.

I figure I've got about three more years before he starts ignoring me - - no brass ring is worth more than what the two of us share right now.