Friday, October 19, 2007

Footnote

Something else happened when I lost my bag with all my ID and important stuff in it.

As I was hurriedly peeking into every friggin' garbage can from Tompkins Square Park to Cheyenne Wyoming searching for my stuff, a weird realization came over me that made me pause - if only for a few precious minutes.

Now that my wallet, keys and phone were all gone - I was without formal proof of my identity - or at least it felt that way for a moment.

A profound feeling of relief swept over me.

I didn't have to be who I am anymore. I could just say fuck it and start again with a new name and any other new things I could think of.

I could have a karmic do-over.

Remember do-overs when you were a kid? How wasted they are on youth!!! Somehow the prospect of wiping the slate clean made me feel expansive and liberated.

Then I got it all back. And life went on as planned.

3 comments:

Dr. Deb said...

I can relate to the feeling of relief and liberation. I'm glad you got it all back though, because having to redo all that would've been a huge bummer.

Here's to saying "fuck it" in other ways :)

~Deb

jo(e) said...

How liberating that would be ....

Michael said...

But how do you outrun your shadow?